"Becki, what are you doing?" My mother asked as I stood at the back screen door with my eyes crossed. "I'm thinking" I replied. Wondering what a six-year-old could possibly be thinking about with that kind of an expression on her face was puzzling. I can't remember if she asked me what I was thinking about or not, but I do remember thinking about the screen of all things. I was looking at the tiny little squares in the screen and I was studying them so intensely that my eyes were crossed because I was standing only inches away.
Have you ever been thinking about something so intently that your eyes were crossed as though trying to look inward? Maybe that is something we should do, or do more often. Have we looked inward lately? What is God drawing our attention to?
I have a critical spirit when looking at myself. I can find so many things wrong, and criticize every detail of my life. Who needs a critic when I am so good at it? I have a low self esteem, as do so many other people.
How does God look at us? Does He see all of the flaws that we see? Do we 'measure' ourselves by the same rule of measure that God does? How do I measure up? What am I using to govern my life? What am I thinking about? Do I make sure that I have a pure heart and clean hands?
Lord, help me to remember that you look at my heart and I am measured by that, not by what I look like, or how others look at me.
Becki Reiser
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